Category Archives: Guests
Guest / reblogged posts
The wonder of nature is just next to us. Only, we are unable to discover it as we are always not at present moment.
Our thought movement like a wild monkey, keep wander from past to future or future to past, but very rarely at present moment.
When you are practicing mindfulness in every moment of life, you’ll see how beautiful is the wild flowers which plenty around us but we don’t even notice on its present.
“Breathing in, I calm body and mind. Breathing out, I smile. Dwelling in the present moment I know this is the only moment.”
by Thich Nhat Hanh
May you be always at now!
Excellent Guidance on reducing the externals so that we can focus on the internals. Thanks Nus.
Once again, there is that defining moment where you say to yourself “screw it all, I have to escape”. It is at this point you are so run down and desensitized to the stress that every phone call is someone asking a favor and you expect others to be unreliable.
So this is where your health starts taking a turn for the worst. The sustained increase in the stress hormone, Cortisol has you restless at night, tired during the day and unable to simply be ‘you’.
In the past, I’ve mentioned the negative effects of stress on health and well-being and a few methods to improve you’re outlook.
Here are a few ways you can reclaim your time:
Growing up we are conditioned to associate the word ‘no’ with a situation whereby we miss out on something we desire. In the attempt to please…
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Note: This post is by a very good friend of mine, her experience is an example of how we can achieve clarity through mindfulness. I encourage sharing of experiences. Thank you very much DB.
This is the story, between my old loyal lover and me. And how the love between us ended, without me resenting him.
The relationship lasted for the best part of 15 years. It was a deep, compassionate and yet complicated relationship. He was very loyal, always there whenever I needed him, especially when I felt sad, depressed, anxious, stressed or any other negative feeling. He was always there without any complaints or expecting anything in return from me. He was the dependable crutch that I leant on to support me, however, people said whenever I was with him he endangered my love and my health. Because his name was often seen in billboards and advertisements – he was also known as cigarettes.
Yes, I was addicted to cigarettes for 15 years. Within a day, on average, I consumed him 20-30 times. Just like everybody else, I was totally aware of the danger from smoking as well as the benefit of quitting. At work, we even made a comprehensive campaign on Quit Smoking for one of our clients. But yet, I did not have any will to part from my lover.
I am the kind of person who has an unusual hobby: I attend meditation retreats. From one retreat to another, from the 3 day retreat to the 5 days to the 7 days up to 10 days. And every time I attended a retreat I automatically took an enforced break from my lover. After that, I would come back to my old lover. But last August, the story between my lover and me were totally different.
It was a retreat lead by Zen Master Thich Nhat Hahn. At that retreat I took Five Mindfulness Training. One of the points from that training is that I vow to keep my body healthy thru selective consumption for body and mind. Out of nowhere, I decided to train myself to refrain from smoking. The first four weeks, I survived. However, after the four weeks had passed, I suffered from deep stress at the office. And yes…. as you may guess, I was tempted to go back to my lover. However, this time was different. I made a very great innovation called: Mindful Smoking. Well at least I still did it mindfully.
And this is how Mindful Smoking worked. I look deeply at the cigarette box, then gently tear the seal and open the box. And again, I took a deep look at those beautiful cigarettes inside the box. Slowly I reach for one of them, pull it out and let it dance in the beautiful fire from the cigarette lighter. Take a deep breath of clean air before I allow it touch my lips. And finally that sacred moment finally arrived. I smoke it! Slowly, gently, deeply, mindfully. Ahhhhh…… One puff…. Two puffs…three puffs… but waitttt…. It did not feel as good as before. Instead, my throat hurt, my mouth got hot, my chest felt tight. And suddenly the realisation came to me. I realized that it was all in my mind saying smoking was good and relaxing. The reality was that smoking did not feel good at all, physically to be more precise. And at that moment I also realized that all of these times, I smoked just to please, distract and run away from any unpleasant feelings such as stress, sadness, and loneliness. I did not want to face them.
Those stressed, sad, angry and, lonely feelings would always be there in my life. I cannot avoid them. But yes, I have the option to embrace them or to run away / distract myself from them. And I choose to learn, as often as possible and I can, to embrace them as friends. When those friends come to visit me, I will sit quietly and take care of them. Just like my master Thich Nhat Hahn taught us, treat those feelings like a mother takes care of her baby. If her baby is crying, then another will hold her baby gently, communicate deeply and finally the baby will sleep again. So if those friends are visiting me, then I will sit quietly, take deep breath. Then I will recognize their presence and take a gentle care of them through breathing mindfully. Slowly those friends will leave me.
It’s been 7 months and I am still learning to break up with my old lover. And this learning to break up process becomes easier for me, with a mindful and gentle approach. No resentment and no broken hearts….